Stop being a mother only

Let Love and Warmth be the ruler!


Daughters are daughters, always unaccommodating while mothers' are mothers, all but emotional fools. Ask any of the daughters today with conscious mother around, you will find hordes of them complaining against mother's being too pathetic with list of Do's and Don'ts up their sleeve. With gruesome news of crime against women, mothers now don't afford to be liberals. Their security actually takes away their sleep. When we were children, our mothers too had trying times in our upbringing. Number of problems they had were not less but definitely less complicated!

But today's teens,OMG, too grown-up, perhaps more than they should with powerful electronic gadgets in  hands which,
undoubtedly, mature them up much before their scheduled time. With information flying around--this had to be the reality. We all need to be tactical at home as well and actually we don't afford to lose our temper. You know,why? Our children are working a lot harder than us with their all-time vast syllabus. The peer-pressure too needs to be addressed. Job-market , in our time, had greater options for government job which ensures stability, less mental pressure. Now, contractual private jobs rule the roost! Social media too creates certain pressure.

How?'Someone is doing this, someone that and O, I am lagging behind', this kind of pangs do intrude their tender minds. One to one talks with your sweetheart work towards subsiding her mental agony of running with time in developing their careers, their academic field! Accept the fact, they are indeed, over-burdened children. 

Last but not the least, keep your household happy. Crumbled mind with heavy  curriculum does eat up their peace of mind as they only have to finish their syllabus, working late into nights. They have every  right to stay happy with warmth oozing out from every corner of your home. That helps...we mothers can only  be our daughter's facilitator, i.e. shoulder the greatest  responsibility of facilitating their unhindered growth, not only that of  body but mind as well. Academic growth and allied fields of development come out of sound mind. So that should be ensured first at all cost. 

Think in a different way, health of her mind should be the first priority, then the fitness of her body! If their Heart is taken care of more than their body, 80% of  war , called daughter-rearing, will be done then, that too  quite effortlessly! Remember, it is an era of  technology and that too teenage today starts from 10 years instead of 13. They are very aware of what happening around and so you are prone to all comparisons.  But , learn forgiving them even if you find your sweetheart improper in her behaviour.  If they shout, sometimes it's a flicker of burdened soul. Yes, heaviness of demanding curriculum does disturb their mental fabric ! In moments of calmness or when you will find her in happy mood, divulge your disappointment with her past rudeness.  If she shouts, we should not shout back. We will maintain our sanity in all situations  and shall consider first the reason behind her bitter mood . After all, we only can be a rock-solid support which they need for their progress. We will try not to be too preachy.....Remember, such sermonizing moms are not likeable ones.  

Now , if you ask me, why I wrote on daughters only,  I would say I know them well for having a loving one at home and for myself being a teacher in a girls' school, that too in a village.....I know them better! Village offers more story, more problems, that too of varied kinds.....

I will keep writing about my extended family I have there at my  school where I work...

Swati G Bose...